Every year my birthday comes around, I think about what I learnt over the past year. And I thought this year that there was so much I wish someone would have told my younger self. So in case any of my younger readers don’t know these things yet, here are 11 life lessons I wish I learnt sooner!
1) Stop caring what people think. People unfortunately want you to fall off your path and be less authentic to your goals. If I cared what people think, I would be bothered by every pageant forum and random user on instagram who thinks that I am a bit extreme for competing 4 years in a row. I call that dedication and I have to live with it, not them. So don’t let someone affect how you live your life based on their opinions. Every successful person has been told that they won’t amount to anything. Be one of those successful people who kept working away and made it.
2) Let failure be your new normal. I constantly feel like I am pushing myself outside of my comfort zone. And with that comes a lot of failure. But it also comes with a lot of learning and great new experiences. Failing sucks, but I make a choice to see the good that comes from trying rather than the feeling of failing. That should be normal, because being great at something often takes many attempts and sometimes even being vulnerable.
3) Just appologize and realize that you are a flawed individual. This one isn’t so easy. But it’s a part of growth and knowing that we all have some bad and toxic traits that stop us from succeeding. Accept that and change what you can for the better.
4) Things almost never work the way you wanted them too ever. And I mean ever! Trust that your hard work and effort is getting you somewhere. Sometimes that somewhere is no where near what your goals were, but better than where you thought you would end up. I truly believe things happen for a reason, timing is everything, and when it’s meant to align with your life, it will. Don’t misconstrue this with the blase attitude of if it’s meant to be it will be. But rather that hard work and perseverance will lead you to where you are best suited.
5) Take care of yourself. Mentally, physically, spiritually. We are not one dimensional, there are many facets of each individual, and all sides should be nurtured. Self care is the only way you can truly ensure that you are giving the best of yourself to all areas of your life. Sometimes that may mean going to bed early, or going to church, or meditating, and sometimes it means enjoying dessert and wine with friends on a wednesday. SELF CARE, it comes in many forms, all are important.
6) Who you spend your time with determines your path and the energy you carry on your path. If you spend time with people with the bad habits, it takes only a fraction of a second for your conscious mind to rationalize the bad habits and allow it for yourself. Choose people wisely. The right people want happiness, success and health for you. The wrong people don’t even have that on their mind about you. Choose your closest 5 people in your life like you would an investment, if there is no return in your overall well-being, there is only a liability over time that you will pay into either in health, happiness or missing out on accomplishing goals.
7) Find what you are passionate about and keep it present in your life daily. For some it’s singing, for others its cats. Whatever it is, keep it present daily if it makes you happy.
8) We all feel lost sometimes. I have yet to have one friend tell me that they have everything figured out and life is perfect for them. Everyone is a work in progress, everyone has stressors and everyone is winging it the best they can. I have stopped thinking that I should have it all figured out all the time and just realized that where I am in life is just where I am meant to be. And that’s fine. One day it will make sense, but for now I am good going after my goals and winging it.
9) Have a plan B, plan C and plan D. Honestly, have a plan E even. Because everything changes and everything evolves, and so should the plan!
10) Comparison is the thief of happiness. There will always be someone who has it better, or has more. But that shouldn’t be a reason to forget how blessed we are. If there is something that you want and someone else has it, keep working for it and don’t give up. Sometimes not even achieving my goals has landed me better situations and rewards than I could have received if I did achieve my goals. So just be happy for where you have gotten.
11) Have faith, something has to be rooting for you. If you aren’t a religious person, this might be a odd one to agree with me about, but I know that someone wants to see me be my best self possible and is helping me achieve that. And although we don’t need to believe in the same force. Let it be God, the universe, karma or good vibes. Someone is definitely rooting for me and you!